The Sea of Weird Side Effects.

Well for all my friends and family worried about my eyes, the problem seems to have eased off a bit. I will be seeing the doctor about it though.

I am currently working my way through all the possible side effects you could ever want to encounter. You know when they put those disclaimers on medicine that start with, "May cause......." and end up with you thinking, Boy are they ever covering their butts.


That's sort of the land I'm stuck in right now, the Sea of Weird Side Effects. I don't want to sound to much like a hypochondriac but apparently my body has figured out it has gone through some sort severe trauma and it's trying to get the point across to my brain in any manner it can.

I am obviously getting better, because the two of them are talking. It started about a week and a half ago with a little nausea, along with constant back and arm pain on my right side. Then I got the light sensitive eyes, which has eased but has been followed by dizzy spells. It took me forever to figure out what was causing that. The source seems to be my neck, again I'll have to talk to the Doctor. I have been treating them with a longer rest period. So far so good. Lee and Joan's brother in-law gets dizzy spells that puts him in bed and there is nothing they (the doctors) can do about it. I can't stand mine, I can't imagine having to live with these all the time.

All we're going to do is slowly paddle through this weird stuff. It may take a few more weeks but I know I'll get to the shore normal (or as normal as I can get) and start to carry on with my life. In the meantime we'll keep paddling.

Weird Science & Road Trips

Big day yesterday, went on a road trip to Superstore and got to do my feeble old guy routine. I hung off the cart as we gathered mostly Dog food and some other provisions.

When I wasn't holding myself up by giving the cart handle a death grip, I kept wondering where Merete went to. It wasn't all that bad but the reality of shopping and dealing with people again was a bit of an eye opener.

But then I knew it would be, because I've preached this for a little while. You don't really recognise day to day stress on your system until you are aware of every beat of your heart.

Yes, I did feel like a little old man, gripping my cart handle and walking at half my normal speed so I wouldn't run out of steam and fall down. Even more so when we got to the car and Merete told my to get in and leave the bags of groceries alone. Fud.

Here's the weird science part, during the first week after the surgery I had a little episode driving home. Have you ever had those eye drops that dilate your pupils and make them feel like they're getting stretch marks from the bright light outside? That's what happened to me during the first week, it felt like my pupils were stuck on pitch black night mode. I thought I was going to pass out.

For the past few weeks I have been in and out of the house walking around the yard. However, I haven't been out for extended periods, mainly because of that stupid wind we've been having. Yesterday, I was out for some time and after a rest in the afternoon we went down to the shore to visit our friends Lee and Joan. After about an hour and a half I thought my head was going to explode. I thought I had some kind of sun stroke. It happened again within the last hour, we were sitting on the deck and after about half an hour it felt like my pupils were dilated, Merete checked and they were.

Now that's some kind of weird science. Is this a drug reaction or am I going to have only come out at night? I guess I have something else to ask the doctor about next week.

A Question of Balance

6:45 am, this just in, from the muscles in my back; 'Time to get up again and move around a bit'. The back spasms are getting better, but when I sit too long or lay in bed too long I get stiff and not in a good way.

I have been out walking around the yard and even cooked a full dinner last night. Unfortunately the Mango Curry Chicken ended up a little dry. Too much time away from the kitchen I suppose.

My strength has improved everyday this past week, there have been no set backs whatsoever. I thought there might be last night when I sneezed twice but I survived, it felt like somebody kicked me in the chest with steel toe boots. After about ten minutes everything settled back to what could be deemed normal.

We are going to have to get out next week. You really can't judge your progress properly unless you interact with the real world. Living on top of a mountain is great for a lot of reasons but it is not real compared to going into the town or city. On our mountain I can feel good and strong but I am only dealing with Merete and the two Cookie Leaches. Actually having to interact with people in real situations like grocery shopping, driving(which I'm not), listening to the din of a store or people in the store is whole different reality.

I still remember these experiences from my original heart episode. I believe I am strong enough tor try some bold experiments next week. We will have to strike a balance between the mountain and the outside world. This question of balance between mountain and town or city will determine my actual recovery level. It will start with the actual drive to town, so far I've been a pretty good patient and passenger but my jaw does get a little sore from clenching my teeth.

Sleep Deprived & Dogs

In the previous post I failed to mention my two pals. In an effort to get some sleep we have moved the dog bed to Merete's side of the room. The other thing we have done is kept Brando off the bed. The night before last when I still had sleeping pills Brando slept in the bed with us. His snoring problem bothered me so I suggested that he sleep in the dog bed with Molly. Merete wanted them out of the room completely, I thought that was too much. Guess who was right?

You got it, not me.

Brando sounded like somebody on a 90cc Honda Mountain bike or a pack of drunken Shriners on Mini Bikes. Finally at about 1am, I wined you're right and moved the pair to the living room, thinking this would solve the problem. When Brando wasn't snoring, the two of them would walk down the hall to bedroom and stare through the gate wondering what they had done wrong to get kicked out of the bedroom. They would stand there for a few minutes and then click their way across the laminate floor back to their beds.

Today, they are still wondering what went wrong and are stuck to me once again like two hairy leeches.

Sleeping Pills & Laxatives

Little did I know when I entered this maze that parts of me would age rapidly. Here I am at 56 all of sudden using Sleeping Pills and Laxatives. I was hoping that the Laxative thing could wait until I was at least in my seventies.
The Sleeping Pill thing is a whole other issue, I have had a tendency over a number of years not being able to shut off my brain at night. I figured one day that sleeping pills would be the answer. The issue I have now is that I am not trying to shut off my brain; I am trying to convince it that it is okay to go to sleep. This can take hours like last night without a Sleeping Pill I didn't actually zonk out until about 3:30am. You're going to heal up real good, getting to sleep at that time and still waking up at 6am.

Here's the other weird thing about sleep, I am scared to go to sleep, quite often since the surgery I'll nod off and suddenly wake up in a panic. This is really a screwed up situation. Here's another thing I have discovered during the past year, if I have too much sugar or food that contains sugar I can't get to sleep. I'm blaming last night Arizona Ice Tea even though I cut it with 50% water.

Back to Laxatives for a moment, I won't dwell because this is a shitty subject.(pardon the pun) I am on these pain killers that bung you up, so the hospital suggested a Laxative at night to keep the pipes working. Okay, I thought a temporary measure, I can deal with that. Bull Pucky, if you take a Laxative at 9:00pm guess when you are going to have a movement? The next F........ing night at 9:00pm that's when. This messes with your whole constitution. Okay so I'm not the brightest tool in the shed, I figured this would naturally straighten out. Noooooo.. After two weeks of missing a good portion of Law & Order SVU each night between 8:30 to 9:00pm, I come up with a bright idea. Why don't I take the Laxative at 7:00am and get back to normal. Brilliant idea yes! Nooo it takes couple of days for this stuff get used to the time change. Mother of God, thank goodness this didn't happen during Spring Ahead or Fall Behind, I would loose my sight.

Today is Doctor day, I will be requesting more Sleeping Pills so I can get a decent nights sleep and dream with great anticipation 7:00am Thursday's Laxative experiment results.

Sun and Fun

Today is Sunday, I have achieved my only objective today which was to call my Mother. I got an update on her condition(s) and she got an update on my condition.

Janna and Travis are going out for a visit and we will get an update from them later.

I was up again at 5:45 am just before my pain meds wore off. I had some breakfast, some medication, some coffee watched the news and before I knew it, it was 9 am.

I then proceeded to lie down again for about an hour and a half and then went outside to watch Merete work. The dogs were stuck to me like canine leeches from the time I got up. It's frustrating not being able help in the garden but I am sure it won't be too long before I can putter a bit within reason. Still no lifting for a minimum of ten weeks. In the meantime I will just have to get used to the dog leeches stuck to me, following my every move.

The scar is healing very well, however the muscle spasms in my back have eased slightly but I am painfully aware when the pain killers start to loose their strength. Tomorrow is blood test day, this will let me know where my coumadin level is which controls the thickness of blood. It has to be between 2.0 and 3.0, as specified by the surgeon. This prevents clots forming around the valve.

Grouchy = Feeling Better

If it weren't for the pain medication I would look much like this picture. I think I actually I look like this on the inside, one big ugly dog that wants to bark or bite somebody's ass off. I guess I'm a little out of sorts this morning having woken up again at 5:30 am for no reason at all other than some body part was aching. I did go back to bed at 7:30 but could not sleep just lay there listening to my heart and having my brain on random play again.

I got back up at 9:15 in search of images to use on the blog and listen to my heart beat. Don't get me wrong hearing your own heart beat is reassuring, but sometimes it gets a little annoying especially if you are trying to get some rest. I sound a little bitchy don't I! When I was at the GP yesterday I remembered what he said to me when he signed my "Must not Work" note. He said "Aren't you going to go a little stir crazy?" My reply was NO, well I've started to reconsider his question. Before I could putter in the garden, drive and even paint. Right now, I can sit, stand, sleep and watch TV. If I'm really pushing myself I can walk down the drive to the gate and back.

Here comes the rationalization. I am alive and each day I am feeling better that makes me grouchy. When I feel better I want to do things. I can't, NOT ALOUD, not for another 10 weeks minimum.

Sometimes you just have to bark a bit to make you feel better. Thanks for listening.

Two Weeks Later

It has been officially 2 weeks since my surgery.
It is officially 2 weeks since I lost a day.
The day that still is shrouded in fog.

The last thing I recall is the masked man saying,"this will make you more comfortable."




On this fine day, I went to my GP. We went through my pile of drugs and received more pain killers. Merete's life would be miserable without these pain killers as would mine. The GP asked when I would be seeing the Cardiologist and I explained not until mid August. He seemed a little taken a back and asked if the surgeon was going to see me. I said to him "Why would he want to see me? He's finished with me, he has handed me back to you and the Cardiologist."The GP grinned and nodded in agreement. I mentioned my hot potato theory and he smiled. "Well somebody better keep an eye you, so I guess it will be me, come in next Wednesday."

The only issue I have right now other than pain from the chest spreading is that my BP is low. My GP is going to monitor this, and has some ideas already. We discussed the recovery time required after heart surgery and he's going to work with me a lot through this period. I am very lucky to have a doctor like this, he is caring, straight forward and has a sense of humour. I couldn't be in better hands, between my GP and Merete (she's almost a doctor), I should recover in no time.

Observations on Specialists

One thing about time after surgery is that you have a lot of time on your hands to ponder 'what you have just been' and 'where it is going to get you'.

I have started to compile a few observations over the past days and thought I'd share them where you like it or not.






Cardiologists: Well before your surgery (unless of course it's a emergency) a GP will refer you to one of these fine people. Expect a lack of personality and an air superiority; they can't help it it's a defence mechanism. The only time they will engage in a human to human rather than doctor to patient conversation is after they have been chastised by your GP for not explaining something clearly enough or scaring the shit out of you for the same reason.

As you heart condition progresses and the explanations gets more complex try to take someone in the examination room with you. That way when you sit in stunned silence with your jaw dropped, you will not be alone. When you go in alone quite often what happens is the Cardiologist will say something befuddling and your mind will not let go of it. You will then procede not hear anything else he says, even if you are quick enough to question him or her immediately, your brain will still be focussed on what was said before and not the response to you query. That is why you need a backup brain sitting next to you. If possible have them take notes for two reasons, first it bugs the hell out of specialists when you take notes and secondly you have reference material to refer too later.

The AirX 1400 -Incentive Spirometer

Before your surgery you get a gift. It is an Incentive Spirometer. Nice Huh! Not only do you get this gift, but you get tor try it out prior to receiving it, wait there's more. After a brief test drive of your Spirometer, it gets personalized with your name on it. Sounds great doesn't it! When you do your the test drive of your shiny new Spirometer try not to show off.

This is how the Spirometer works. First you inhale as much air as possible, then you put your lips on the white plastic mouth and blow. Easy enough , yes but there is a bit of a catch, you want the little white ball to stay at the top for as long as possible. (that is within reason of course don't be too ambitious).

The nurse will congratulate you on your achievement and take your Spirometer and personilize it for you by writing down the time the ball floated at the top of the tube. She will also do something a little sly, she will reset you Spirometer from 210cc to 400cc. What does this do you may ask? It almost doubles the opening size where the air comes into the device.

Say you're a gifted individual and can suck a golf ball through a a garden hose, this effectively changes the garden hose to storm drain. You are going to pass out before you post the number nurse has written on the Incentive Spirometer. Until I noticed the changed setting I was blowing my brains out and only getting 5cc compared to the 12cc I did on my trial run. Once I found out about the little adjustment I discovered I was at 9cc. Now I have Incentive using my Spirometer, if I hadn't found that little trick they played I would have caved in my head.

Merete said that she saw the nurse change the setting. I think maybe she slid the nurse five bucks hoping that if my head caved in I would be easier to live with. She could just park me on the deck and hang flower baskets off of me.

You had Heart Surgery When.......

The Patient's View

My Top 10 things that will tell you.


1. You start talking about things in past tense. Example :"I used to love this hot weather."or"I used enjoy a cigar and a glass of port following a meal of roast lamb."

2. You have difficulty just reaching your ass, let alone wiping it.

3. When you cough, you hold a pillow and your eyes bug out.

4.You just start crying.

5. Your care giver loves you but you are a pain in the ass. You're acting at least 30 years older.

6. You blurt shit out rudely because something just stabbed you in the side.

7. You get excited about a BM.

8. Your'e happy in bed making notes on nothing.

9. You look forward to spending time with family and friends.

10. You just can't wait for tomorrow.

Tummy Face

Well say Good Bye to Tummy Face. After a sleepless night I am headed to the doctor this morning to have my stitches removed. Hopefully I'll get some sleeping pills as well, I couldn't sleep because my brain was on random play (more on that later).

8.6.kgs of water. Look out Ladies.

I always wonder why my female friends complained about retaining water. I get it now, I gained 8.6kg of fluid during the surgery. I just want to know where did it come from? The weird thing was when I woke up Tuesday morning I had lost almost all of it, I know I peed a lot but not over 16 pounds of water. Where does it go and how can you keep it away?

I'm a Drunk Painter Jim, not a Miracle Worker

Good Morning Blogite Family.

I have landed once again on my weak and wobbly feet.
It was a long ride home yesterday, giving me lots of time to ponder the past few days.
I will be doing some short entries until my strength builds, so don't expect any mystical insights or deep thoughts; as if you would anyway. The most common expression over the next few days here on the mountain will probably be "fuck that hurts" or "which pill?"

I have to rest now but in my next post I'll show you where it really hurts and tell you why!

HUGE NEWS!!

Dad was discharged today...much to my heart's delight and my anxiety's dismay!
He is home in his comfy leather chair eating ice cream as I type this (a small heart smart portion of course) He is so glad to be back on his mountain top!



A few things happened in the days leading up to his discharge.
Yesterday his hemoglobin was low and he was quite lethargic from it. To fix this he received two pints of blood which perked him right back up!

He was given new medication to get rid of the excess fluid, by yesterday evening he had only lost 2lbs....BUT overnight, he lost 10lbs! He was pretty worn out from getting up and down to go to the bathroom, but it was worth it, all that peeing was his ticket out of the hospital.

My Mom and Dad both attended a discharge orientation yesterday which detailed home care and signs to look out for in case of trouble. Today they attended an orientation on Coumadin, which is a blood thinner Dad will have to be on for the rest of his life. The orientation detailed associated risks and dietary requirements to follow while on Coumadin. My Dad was soooo happy when he learned he could never eat Kale again. I'm sure he would have jumped up and down if he was allowed :) He can't have any leafy greens which is a shame because there are actually a few that he likes!

Unfortunately, his schedule is very demanding now that he is home. He already has to go to the clinic in Sooke tomorrow to have blood work and then to the doctor the next day to have his stitches removed. He will have to go to town for blood work twice a week for the first little while. The blood work is to check his RNI levels (I think that is right) which affect how much Coumadin he needs to take. It is all very complicated! I think all the trips to town are really going to wear him out. At least he will sleep better now that he is in his own bed.

The next 4-6 weeks are going to be very tiring, and intense for both my parents, my Dad especially of course! I realize everyone will be excited to have him home and eager to get in touch, but for now it is best if we all express our excitement through emails to my Mom and blog comments.
I will be helping my Mom figure out a visiting schedule for those who are interested tentatively beginning in mid July.

That is all for now. My Mom will be doing some more blog posts from home and I will step in when she can't get to it. Sorry we left y'all hanging!

xo Janna