The Latest News 12/23/2009

I had my meeting yesterday with Doctor Novak. I had actually met him before just prior to my surgery when I stayed the weekend at RJH. He is a very nice, no nonsense straight talking specialist, and most importantly you can understand him.

Within the next 4 to 6 weeks I will a CRT implanted in my chest and connected to my heart. This will monitor what my heart muscle is doing and correct a problem I have which is causing the low EF.

Right now the two lower chambers are not pumping at the same time. Because of my Bundle Branch Blocking the signal to the left ventricle is routed through the right side of my heart. This give the heart a right,left pumping action. This causes shortness of breath and fatigue.

Two of the three wires implanted will correct this. The third wire is the safety brake, if my heart stops it will shock it back into action. I will be in surgery for 3 to 5 hours and will spend up to 5 days in hospital. I will not be able to drive for a month. I will have to stay away from things with big magnetic fields and I will set off metal detectors at every airport in the world.

For more information c click on the link below.
http://circ.ahajournals.org/cgi/content/full/109/3/296?maxtoshow=&HITS=10&hits=10&RESULTFORMAT=&fulltext=cardio+resynchronization&searchid=1&FIRSTINDEX=0&resourcetype=HWCIT

That's it for now, have A VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS.

Tomorrow and Hair

Tomorrow at 9:15 I have an appointment with the new doctor. I am not sure how to spell his name so for now I'll call him Dr. N.


We will be discussing the implantation of the ICD into my chest. At least that's what I think he going to talk to me about. It could be he just wants tell me about his trip to France last summer and how he ate too much rich food. I guess we'll find out.

That is a picture of my brother Jim and I in the bathtub somewhere in 1956. I've decided that I like my hair cut and will try reproduce it. You've got do something while you wait for those pesky doctor appointment, and I'm not that energetic so letting my hair grow is a nice low impact task.

New Meds

Here is one of my main helpers and a slice of Merete. This picture was taken the day our new iMac arrived.



I was going to put up a more pertinent image but the new medication I'm taking makes me kinda dreamy and a bit more goofy.

It was interesting driving into town yesterday, felt like I was in a driving simulator. I am sure the effects will change after I have been on the medication for a while. I won't be driving alone or by myself anymore.

It is a new Beta Blocker. Here's the irony, my heart isn't beating as strongly as it should so they changed my meds. A symptom of poor EF is that you are short of breath. Guess what one of the side effects of this drug is......shortness of breath. So far no major effects, just this dreamy state and an inability to focus on things.

I think I've done pretty well with this post considering my concentration is hooped. Yes, to answer the imaginary question they will be putting in an ICD as far as I know. It is in the hands of Gods and Novack apparently. To describe it (an ICD) briefly, it's like an emergency brake for my heart. If my heart goes to fast it slows it down and if my heart tries to stop, this will kick shock my heart back to work and save my life.

Monday's News

I'd post a picture but I don't have one! I'll correct this soon. Got a call this afternoon from my Cardio Man's office. First I was told I would get a call from my GP's Office and I did later. Dr. P & Dr. M have come with a medication change which I will find out this Thursday.

I will also have a another Echo Cardiogram in January and a follow up appointment with Dr. M and the ICD people in January.

Heavy sigh of relief, as long I don't do anything stupid(which I like to do) I think I am safe until January. In the meantime I will just behave and will post after I see Dr. Pocock on Thursday.

Waiting and Waiting and Still Waiting!

Just a quick note to everyone. I am doing fine, but still a little frustrated and bored. We just Skyped Brie in Egypt so I gave her update on the Doctor scene. Now it's your turn.

I called my GP to get my INR results because on Monday it was 5.2 which means my blood was too thin. Thursday I had it tested again, usually I get called with the results the same day but not this time. I called at about 1:35pm and the INR was 1.8 which is too thick. This means I can go back on Warfarin of 4.5mg a day.

I then called the Cardiologist, he was in the cath lab and there were no notes about his discussion with my GP and no advice. I did found out though that I was referred to the ICD Techs on October 28 and probably won't hear from them until after Christmas. I have also been put on Mildenburgers to do list for Monday morning. What this means is that his girl will call me about his discussion with Pocock after she talks to him.

Reminds me of when you get line of people and whisper in one ear, 'Joe is eating an apple'. By the time it gets to the end of the line 'Joan is leaving town with Ernie'.

Good News/Bad news, Unless I get a call saying we need you to come into the ICD LAb on next Tuesday, I can take deep breath. I must be stable enough that this isn't a panic.

What's Bad News, I still have to wait here something/anything.

Thinking of Our Girls

I know this has been torture for me but it has been torture for the 3 women in my life and my siblings as well. I would say it has been torture for the dogs but they have the combined IQ of a fence post.


Ooops, didn't I say my cardio guy has the personality of a fence post.

Don't you love it when somebody telegraphs a joke. For those of you younger than me(and believe me there's a lot of you). It's a joke set up technique, you the viewer or listener knows a joke is coming well ahead of time. The best thing to do is make it a fast telegram, believe me it's better.

I had my meeting with my GP yesterday. I did not get the news I wanted. My EF has fallen further and it has been confirmed by the 'Gold Standard' of tests(19). I am no longer able to work, I would be pushing my luck.

What does this mean? I don't really know, sounds like I have to stop enjoying the life I know and love. No more wine, no smokes, no rich foods but I've heard all that before. It is because of the love for my family that I will consider these changes.

My favourite GP is going to contact Cardioman to find out the plan. If there is a plan. I say that because we're in week 7 and I haven't heard from Cardioman. Then I am not the only heart on the block so to speak.

So I wait. At least I have my best man on it. Wait for my next post called something like Now Bitter and Really Pissed Off. Sorry part of the grieving process, this the angry phase.

PS: Regarding the first paragraph, the great support of my friends and in-laws has not and never will be forgotten.

The Torture Never Stops

Yes, I am quoting from a Frank Zappa song. In the background of the song there is someone moaning and screaming. I think it's my bowels.

It has been 6 weeks since Dr. M told me that my EF was too low. I finally got my test last Thursday at the 5 week mark. He has had the electronic posted results since that afternoon. Yet today I had to call his office to see if I could get some information. "No written documentation yet" and Dr.Mildenburger is out of the office this week but Ms Winehouse will leave him a note that I called.

Should I be pissed off, usually I have the Mildenburger Syndrome for only a few days. Now it's been six weeks, my stomach is a mess not to mention my attitude.

I think I'll call my trusty GP and see if he can suggest anything for my stomach and maybe see if he has the electronic version of the test results. There's a pro-active move for you, Just Reach Out and Grab the Specialist by His Horns. Well actually go around him to see the doctor you trust and maybe get an answer. We'll see won't we!

Barometers of Health

Just a little warning for those faint of heart or overly sensitive to the word Penis. Turn away now and read no further.

Please turn away, this may be too funny and the word Penis may be used a number of times.

Well at least I think it will be funny and probably filled with more information than you will ever need or ever wanted to know. The information you are about receive is based on years of observation and paticularly the past couple of years. It has been forced to the surface by the new and quite amusing Viagra commercials on TV. You know the ones where the sincere men talk about how Antiquing, Decorating, and Strolling almost ruined their lives.

Here's a little known fact I discovered. Much like the nose of a dog the male penis can be used as a Barometer of a Man's Health. When a dog's nose is damp and shiny the dog is in good health. When a dog's nose is dry and cracked something is lacking in the health department or it's day to day life. In man's case if a penis is blessed with good colouration and a firm demeanour the man is in good health. When a penis becomes pale and noodle like there is something wrong with with his health or there is something lacking in day to day life.

One might ask what can you do to help this pale noodle condition? It is quite simple really, one must evaluate one's life style and general health. Check your blood pressure if it is too low this may be a cause for concern. See your doctor. Perhaps a change of diet, more rest and drinking plenty of fluids may help. Cut back on alcohol, smoking and fatty foods there is nothing worse than a drunken, smokey fat penis.

Well that is all I have to say about man's little and sometimes not so little barometer. I didn't have much to do this morning, I was just noodling around the house and thought I would post something and share some knowledge.

"Without Deviation from the Norm, Progress is Not Possible." Frank Zappa

Still Waters run Pissed Off

Thursday I went and got Nuked Up for my EF test. I have had this test before. It involves a lot of waiting. First they put in an IV and put a little nuclear waste into your system. After thirty minutes the tech draws some blood out of your arm into a special syringe filled with more nuclear waste. Then you wait again.

In five minutes the tech comes back and puts the blood back into you. Now you will Light up the special MRI style camera. Each picture takes from five to fifteen minutes and as Anna the camera operator said this sets "The Gold Standard for EF Tests". In normal speak that means it's the most accurate.

I broke the Nuke Camera Speed record by being extremely still and produced the fastest EF test Anna had ever done. The first two pictures were done in just over five minutes each and the third was done in six minutes twenty seconds.

At the end of the test, I tried to dig some information out of Anna. She didn't give in saying, "You'll have the test results in a week to ten days, but Dr. Mildenburger has put a rush on this so he will have the results this afternoon."

He should have put a rush on it, I have been waiting since October 14th for this test. In the meantime I get to deal with phantom weird chest pains and anxiety attacks wondering what they are going to do with me.

If things are urgent I should get a call from the Electronic Boys. They may have to put in a De-Fibulator Device, this would kick in and shock the heart muscle into working properly.

Sounds like fun doesn't. I may have to retire from Big Box Work wouldn't want to Tazer any of the customers. It would be a mark on my permanent record.

Melon Head Update

Yes this me and no I am not applauding myself.
This is my 'Why I oughta' look.

'Why I oughta' not let my cardiologist get under my skin.
'Why I oughta' not worry about stuff.
'Why I oughta' change a few bad habits.

'Why I oughta' wait until I get the results of the next test and then maybe get excited.
Apparently I am going to have another test because my last Echo didn't show the improvement Mildenburger was looking for. My EF factor has not changed since the surgery, this is the amount of blood being pushed out of the heart when it beats. My level is too low and the test they did was not accurate enough. The test was done in early September and now in mid-October I feel better than before. However Uncle Mildey is being cautious. Now Merete has to put up with me while I shake off the Mildenburger Syndrome which I usually suffer from after every visit. Generally lasting 2 or 3 days.

What does this all mean? Like my old Cardio Doc Henderson said you may end up with a pacemaker. So more than likely I'll end up setting off all the metal detectors at the airport.

'Why I oughta' wait until the next test results and shut up. Here's a link to some information on EF. I found it interesting and not frightening at all.
http://yourtotalhealth.ivillage.com/ejection-fraction.html

I'll blog you later.

Two Headed Dragons

One of the side effects of surgery is depression. It’s not that I’m unfamiliar with depression, I have suffered from it on and off for most of my life. It never lasted very long except one time. I did seek professional help and have been relatively good every since. The hospital doesn’t talk that much about depression, either does the doctors. They just give you a prescription and send you home. It’s not quite right, if I hadn’t recognised the name of the drug I wouldn’t have known any better. The problem is that silence doesn’t help you. Most anti-depressives have side effects and they effect everyone differently.


It has lots to do with the dosage, Bupropian in too high of a dose makes me anxious. I may not feel depressed but it feels like the walls are closing in when I travel anywhere. The other thing they need to tell you is that you have ease off these drugs. DON’T LET YOUR PRESCRIPTION LAPSE AND GO WITHOUT THE DRUGS FOR A FEW DAYS. The next thing you know you’ll meet the two headed dragon.

The two headed dragon slides up to you and starts to work. The head with the short neck starts to whisper things in your ear. Self doubt, questions your actions, reminds you of the things you should be doing. While it starts to whisper, the head with long neck begins gradually to wrap itself around you, starting at the bottom and working upwards. The next thing you know you are not sleeping well, you’re tired all the time. Puppies on TV start to make you cry and anything even remotely sentimental makes you well up. While this is going on the whispering continues and gets stronger. Your subconscious won’t let you be, the next thing know you are staring into space contemplating the pile of crap your life has become. What are you going to do?

You in your foggiest moment realises that your prescription has run out so you get back on your medication. That’s what you do. If you have never had any medication for depression, you go see your GP and explain to him or her what has been going on inside your melon. You take extra vitamin B50’s, go to bed early for a few days and let things get balanced out. Before you know it, your life isn’t a pile of crap, you stop beating yourself up and start to deal with the minor problems that have been bothering you. One problem at a time.

Anyway, my two headed dragon has started to uncoil from me, the whispering has become more of a mumble. It’s raining outside with sunny breaks much like life. I feel better having talked about after surgery depression. The pain I suffer from is minor now, my breathing is stabilizing, the problems I have to deal with are not so bad, I am almost ready to get back to work at the Big Box and I am glad to be alive.

Don’t forget to take your medication whatever it is.

Whazz Up ?

Some of you may be wondering how I'm doing and Whazz Up?

Well, I have been busy. I am still suffering from chest pains caused by being split open like a ripe melon with ribs. My heart is still running a little fast but we're working on that.

Like this Goldenrod Spider, I'm hanging out at home most of the time waiting for things happen.



I did manage to finished the big triptych I was working. I have been painting it in my mind since April and have been physically able to paint since early July.

It hurts, but by pacing myself and taking breaks I can do it. It did take a number of days to recover after completing this work. http://theravenshome.blogspot.com/

On Friday the paintings left for their new life in Toronto. No, it was not a sad occasion, if I kept all the paintings I do I wouldn't have any room to move. They are sort of like kids, you have them, you watch them grow, and then they leave. You still love them but you are happy that they have succeeded and have found a place in the world of their own. The only real difference is that you will always worry about the kids, not so much when it comes to paintings.

The proud father of two great successful daughters and the creator of a bunch of paintings that have found good homes.

Cardiologists & Amy without Tattoos

Yes, I have been dogging it a bit. I've been busy painting my buns off for the past 2 weeks. I did however make time to see Heir CardioMan last Wednesday.
He has reverted back to his ol' self and it was a bit like dealing with a 4x4 chunk of pressure treated wood. I can never tell whether I'm improving or not after a visit with Za Doctor. Apparently I'm still alive and have improved since the surgery. Sort of, kind of, maybe, like I said the heart is ticking away.


He took my blood pressure and then asked how it was when I took it at home. The other weird one was that he asked if "they" were monitoring my INR (warfarin blood thinner) or was somebody else. This made me laugh a bit. My GP is monitoring it with me. The other funny one was that he asked why I came to see him rather than the Cardio Surgeon. I explained I was told the visit was an either or situation and he was chosen. Apparently this made him feel special because he wants to see me again in six months. Joy oh bliss, yet another trip into town. I should feel happy that he is giving me such fine care especially after this visit, he actually got my name right.

The highlight of the visit was that I had an ECG by an Amy Winehouse lookalike. She didn't have Amy's tattoos but I was quite amused. The other cool thing was that ECG machines are now the size of 2 slices of bread stacked together and go directly into the laptop computer via the USB port. How Star Trekky is that?

All in all not a bad visit, I still have to check with my GP regarding my high pulse rate, my blood pressure is good but my pump is running at 93 beats. I have to go for an EKG or for those of you back east a Doppler on August 2oth. This test will look at my Dacron Aorta Root repair, the surgeon likes to appreciate his own work.

I don't mean to sound cynical but when I re-read this I thought I should clarify something. I do appreciate the fine work both the cardiologist,the surgeon, the fabulous nurses and staff of Royal Jubilee Hospital. I thank them for keeping me alive. If I can't poke a little fun their way and keep my twisted sense of humour intact I wouldn't be doing my job and that wouldn't be any fun at all, might as well become a ....................... . I'll leave it to you folks to decide, just pick the most boring occupation and insert into the blank.

A Quick Update

Daughter Janna, told me I had to do an update because I have been lax in my duties.

First, I am doing pretty well. The BPV seems to be under control, however the CRIS has kicked up a bit lately. Regarding the BPV, we did the exercises over again, changed my pillow this seems to have worked.

My only problem recently has been a buggered left shoulder. I did something on the weekend and have been paying the price ever since. I was trying to be a gentleman stretching to open the gate on the deck for Merete. Teach me to try and be a gentleman. What was I thinking!


This heat wave has been wiping me out. I used to love the heat, working in the garden, building things and other recreational activities. Right now I can't handle it, my heart rate goes up and I hear the valve clicking away. Quite irritating. The best part today was I went to town and found something for my shoulder at the pharmacy. It's acetaminophen with a muscle relaxant, boy what a pain reliever. Fortunately right now I am just between doses, so I can type. This drug mellows you out and relaxes everything. I had been having some issues with nerve damage in my chest and the cracking of my ribs, this has relieved everything. What a change to be pain free, hopefully I will be able to do more of my exercises without hurting keeping in mind not to over do it as well.(that's for Janna)

"Sorry, I suffer from BPV."

I mentioned in a few postings about weird side effects, trying desperately not to sound too much like my Mother. I love my Mother but she has a genetic predisposition to focus on health issues that may or may not be totally real. After all she does have “fibre myalgia”. In my opinion a manufactured disease that doctors made up when they can't figure out what is wrong with a patient. This condition is usually diagnosed when the patient hasn’t been totally honest with the doctor and the doctor becomes stumped by the weird list of symptoms. Sort of like a bad episode of the TV series House. I have tried my best to suppress this genetic predisposition, not that I haven’t caught myself a few times getting carried away with self diagnosis.

I thought the dizzy spells I have been having since the surgery were caused by this blasted sinus infection. Not so, according to my GP, I suffer from BPV or Benign Positional Vertigo. Quel Surprisssse! According to the Internet, small particles of garbage have come loose in my head. They have lodged themselves in the area of my inner ear that controls my balance. This area looks a bit like a snail shell. The Epley Maneuver is a set on exercises that cure this condition in over 85% of the cases. I have yet to complete the Epley Maneuver, instead I have come up with a few ideas where BPV could come in handy as an excuse for questionable behaviour. Feel free to add to the list.

Perhaps you have had one or two too many glasses of wine. When you stand up you are unsteady with your movement and perhaps slurr a word or two. This could be caused by BPV. Perhaps you are driving and have been distracted by conversation and something shiny on the side of the road. The local constable has pulled you over for driving erratically, this too could be caused by BPV. You bump into someone suggestively that you find attractive, this could be a caused by BPV or Cranial Rectal Insertion Syndrome (another condition that I occasionally suffered from).

The Cranial Rectal Insertion Syndrome is something alas that I will suffer from until I leave this planet for a better place. I’ll let you know how the Epley Maneuver goes, hopefully it will correct my Benign Positional Vertigo.

http://www.tchain.com/otoneurology/disorders/bppv/epley/first.html

Tandem Nightmare & Head Colds

Brother Jim arrived last Wednesday night. My head cold arrived Tuesday night. I finally figured out what was causing my dizzy spells.

Apparently my head is full of crap. (just keep your smart remarks to yourselves). Crap makes me crabby. We actually managed to have a pretty good visit and then on Saturday we drove Jim to the ferry so he could go visit Mom.

I learned a few things on Saturday. Number one, it is impossible for me to be a passenger in a car for more than 40 minutes at a time. Not only is it difficult in my 'tender' condition but my nerves take a beating like you wouldn't believe. The trip to the ferry is one and a half hours each way. So you just imagine the aching basket case I was by the time we got home. To compound this torture, Saanich was invaded by a group of American Tandem Bicyclists.

They were on every road we drove down, coming from every imaginable direction. Using bizarre hand signals that only meant something to them. Some even had small children strapped on the rear bumpers like some kind of trophy to indicate their breeding abilities. It was hideous, Tandem bikes everywhere, with Americans dressed in brightly coloured stretch biking outfits. To make it even worse we got trapped behind some maniac driving a tour bus, that was determined not screw up his schedule and reach Buchart Gardens by his designated time. He roared up behind the Americans, then passed them on hills and blind curves. Finally in Brentwood Bay he turned off, but by then the damage was done. I thought I was going to puke.

There was a glimmer of hope, we thought we had out run the brightly coloured Tandem Americans. But noooooo there were more. Finally I had to close my eyes each time Merete passed a Tandem, just to keep from screaming and puking. We got home safely but I was severely damaged and probably won't ride in the car past Sooke for the rest of the month.

The Sea of Weird Side Effects.

Well for all my friends and family worried about my eyes, the problem seems to have eased off a bit. I will be seeing the doctor about it though.

I am currently working my way through all the possible side effects you could ever want to encounter. You know when they put those disclaimers on medicine that start with, "May cause......." and end up with you thinking, Boy are they ever covering their butts.


That's sort of the land I'm stuck in right now, the Sea of Weird Side Effects. I don't want to sound to much like a hypochondriac but apparently my body has figured out it has gone through some sort severe trauma and it's trying to get the point across to my brain in any manner it can.

I am obviously getting better, because the two of them are talking. It started about a week and a half ago with a little nausea, along with constant back and arm pain on my right side. Then I got the light sensitive eyes, which has eased but has been followed by dizzy spells. It took me forever to figure out what was causing that. The source seems to be my neck, again I'll have to talk to the Doctor. I have been treating them with a longer rest period. So far so good. Lee and Joan's brother in-law gets dizzy spells that puts him in bed and there is nothing they (the doctors) can do about it. I can't stand mine, I can't imagine having to live with these all the time.

All we're going to do is slowly paddle through this weird stuff. It may take a few more weeks but I know I'll get to the shore normal (or as normal as I can get) and start to carry on with my life. In the meantime we'll keep paddling.

Weird Science & Road Trips

Big day yesterday, went on a road trip to Superstore and got to do my feeble old guy routine. I hung off the cart as we gathered mostly Dog food and some other provisions.

When I wasn't holding myself up by giving the cart handle a death grip, I kept wondering where Merete went to. It wasn't all that bad but the reality of shopping and dealing with people again was a bit of an eye opener.

But then I knew it would be, because I've preached this for a little while. You don't really recognise day to day stress on your system until you are aware of every beat of your heart.

Yes, I did feel like a little old man, gripping my cart handle and walking at half my normal speed so I wouldn't run out of steam and fall down. Even more so when we got to the car and Merete told my to get in and leave the bags of groceries alone. Fud.

Here's the weird science part, during the first week after the surgery I had a little episode driving home. Have you ever had those eye drops that dilate your pupils and make them feel like they're getting stretch marks from the bright light outside? That's what happened to me during the first week, it felt like my pupils were stuck on pitch black night mode. I thought I was going to pass out.

For the past few weeks I have been in and out of the house walking around the yard. However, I haven't been out for extended periods, mainly because of that stupid wind we've been having. Yesterday, I was out for some time and after a rest in the afternoon we went down to the shore to visit our friends Lee and Joan. After about an hour and a half I thought my head was going to explode. I thought I had some kind of sun stroke. It happened again within the last hour, we were sitting on the deck and after about half an hour it felt like my pupils were dilated, Merete checked and they were.

Now that's some kind of weird science. Is this a drug reaction or am I going to have only come out at night? I guess I have something else to ask the doctor about next week.

A Question of Balance

6:45 am, this just in, from the muscles in my back; 'Time to get up again and move around a bit'. The back spasms are getting better, but when I sit too long or lay in bed too long I get stiff and not in a good way.

I have been out walking around the yard and even cooked a full dinner last night. Unfortunately the Mango Curry Chicken ended up a little dry. Too much time away from the kitchen I suppose.

My strength has improved everyday this past week, there have been no set backs whatsoever. I thought there might be last night when I sneezed twice but I survived, it felt like somebody kicked me in the chest with steel toe boots. After about ten minutes everything settled back to what could be deemed normal.

We are going to have to get out next week. You really can't judge your progress properly unless you interact with the real world. Living on top of a mountain is great for a lot of reasons but it is not real compared to going into the town or city. On our mountain I can feel good and strong but I am only dealing with Merete and the two Cookie Leaches. Actually having to interact with people in real situations like grocery shopping, driving(which I'm not), listening to the din of a store or people in the store is whole different reality.

I still remember these experiences from my original heart episode. I believe I am strong enough tor try some bold experiments next week. We will have to strike a balance between the mountain and the outside world. This question of balance between mountain and town or city will determine my actual recovery level. It will start with the actual drive to town, so far I've been a pretty good patient and passenger but my jaw does get a little sore from clenching my teeth.

Sleep Deprived & Dogs

In the previous post I failed to mention my two pals. In an effort to get some sleep we have moved the dog bed to Merete's side of the room. The other thing we have done is kept Brando off the bed. The night before last when I still had sleeping pills Brando slept in the bed with us. His snoring problem bothered me so I suggested that he sleep in the dog bed with Molly. Merete wanted them out of the room completely, I thought that was too much. Guess who was right?

You got it, not me.

Brando sounded like somebody on a 90cc Honda Mountain bike or a pack of drunken Shriners on Mini Bikes. Finally at about 1am, I wined you're right and moved the pair to the living room, thinking this would solve the problem. When Brando wasn't snoring, the two of them would walk down the hall to bedroom and stare through the gate wondering what they had done wrong to get kicked out of the bedroom. They would stand there for a few minutes and then click their way across the laminate floor back to their beds.

Today, they are still wondering what went wrong and are stuck to me once again like two hairy leeches.

Sleeping Pills & Laxatives

Little did I know when I entered this maze that parts of me would age rapidly. Here I am at 56 all of sudden using Sleeping Pills and Laxatives. I was hoping that the Laxative thing could wait until I was at least in my seventies.
The Sleeping Pill thing is a whole other issue, I have had a tendency over a number of years not being able to shut off my brain at night. I figured one day that sleeping pills would be the answer. The issue I have now is that I am not trying to shut off my brain; I am trying to convince it that it is okay to go to sleep. This can take hours like last night without a Sleeping Pill I didn't actually zonk out until about 3:30am. You're going to heal up real good, getting to sleep at that time and still waking up at 6am.

Here's the other weird thing about sleep, I am scared to go to sleep, quite often since the surgery I'll nod off and suddenly wake up in a panic. This is really a screwed up situation. Here's another thing I have discovered during the past year, if I have too much sugar or food that contains sugar I can't get to sleep. I'm blaming last night Arizona Ice Tea even though I cut it with 50% water.

Back to Laxatives for a moment, I won't dwell because this is a shitty subject.(pardon the pun) I am on these pain killers that bung you up, so the hospital suggested a Laxative at night to keep the pipes working. Okay, I thought a temporary measure, I can deal with that. Bull Pucky, if you take a Laxative at 9:00pm guess when you are going to have a movement? The next F........ing night at 9:00pm that's when. This messes with your whole constitution. Okay so I'm not the brightest tool in the shed, I figured this would naturally straighten out. Noooooo.. After two weeks of missing a good portion of Law & Order SVU each night between 8:30 to 9:00pm, I come up with a bright idea. Why don't I take the Laxative at 7:00am and get back to normal. Brilliant idea yes! Nooo it takes couple of days for this stuff get used to the time change. Mother of God, thank goodness this didn't happen during Spring Ahead or Fall Behind, I would loose my sight.

Today is Doctor day, I will be requesting more Sleeping Pills so I can get a decent nights sleep and dream with great anticipation 7:00am Thursday's Laxative experiment results.

Sun and Fun

Today is Sunday, I have achieved my only objective today which was to call my Mother. I got an update on her condition(s) and she got an update on my condition.

Janna and Travis are going out for a visit and we will get an update from them later.

I was up again at 5:45 am just before my pain meds wore off. I had some breakfast, some medication, some coffee watched the news and before I knew it, it was 9 am.

I then proceeded to lie down again for about an hour and a half and then went outside to watch Merete work. The dogs were stuck to me like canine leeches from the time I got up. It's frustrating not being able help in the garden but I am sure it won't be too long before I can putter a bit within reason. Still no lifting for a minimum of ten weeks. In the meantime I will just have to get used to the dog leeches stuck to me, following my every move.

The scar is healing very well, however the muscle spasms in my back have eased slightly but I am painfully aware when the pain killers start to loose their strength. Tomorrow is blood test day, this will let me know where my coumadin level is which controls the thickness of blood. It has to be between 2.0 and 3.0, as specified by the surgeon. This prevents clots forming around the valve.

Grouchy = Feeling Better

If it weren't for the pain medication I would look much like this picture. I think I actually I look like this on the inside, one big ugly dog that wants to bark or bite somebody's ass off. I guess I'm a little out of sorts this morning having woken up again at 5:30 am for no reason at all other than some body part was aching. I did go back to bed at 7:30 but could not sleep just lay there listening to my heart and having my brain on random play again.

I got back up at 9:15 in search of images to use on the blog and listen to my heart beat. Don't get me wrong hearing your own heart beat is reassuring, but sometimes it gets a little annoying especially if you are trying to get some rest. I sound a little bitchy don't I! When I was at the GP yesterday I remembered what he said to me when he signed my "Must not Work" note. He said "Aren't you going to go a little stir crazy?" My reply was NO, well I've started to reconsider his question. Before I could putter in the garden, drive and even paint. Right now, I can sit, stand, sleep and watch TV. If I'm really pushing myself I can walk down the drive to the gate and back.

Here comes the rationalization. I am alive and each day I am feeling better that makes me grouchy. When I feel better I want to do things. I can't, NOT ALOUD, not for another 10 weeks minimum.

Sometimes you just have to bark a bit to make you feel better. Thanks for listening.

Two Weeks Later

It has been officially 2 weeks since my surgery.
It is officially 2 weeks since I lost a day.
The day that still is shrouded in fog.

The last thing I recall is the masked man saying,"this will make you more comfortable."




On this fine day, I went to my GP. We went through my pile of drugs and received more pain killers. Merete's life would be miserable without these pain killers as would mine. The GP asked when I would be seeing the Cardiologist and I explained not until mid August. He seemed a little taken a back and asked if the surgeon was going to see me. I said to him "Why would he want to see me? He's finished with me, he has handed me back to you and the Cardiologist."The GP grinned and nodded in agreement. I mentioned my hot potato theory and he smiled. "Well somebody better keep an eye you, so I guess it will be me, come in next Wednesday."

The only issue I have right now other than pain from the chest spreading is that my BP is low. My GP is going to monitor this, and has some ideas already. We discussed the recovery time required after heart surgery and he's going to work with me a lot through this period. I am very lucky to have a doctor like this, he is caring, straight forward and has a sense of humour. I couldn't be in better hands, between my GP and Merete (she's almost a doctor), I should recover in no time.

Observations on Specialists

One thing about time after surgery is that you have a lot of time on your hands to ponder 'what you have just been' and 'where it is going to get you'.

I have started to compile a few observations over the past days and thought I'd share them where you like it or not.






Cardiologists: Well before your surgery (unless of course it's a emergency) a GP will refer you to one of these fine people. Expect a lack of personality and an air superiority; they can't help it it's a defence mechanism. The only time they will engage in a human to human rather than doctor to patient conversation is after they have been chastised by your GP for not explaining something clearly enough or scaring the shit out of you for the same reason.

As you heart condition progresses and the explanations gets more complex try to take someone in the examination room with you. That way when you sit in stunned silence with your jaw dropped, you will not be alone. When you go in alone quite often what happens is the Cardiologist will say something befuddling and your mind will not let go of it. You will then procede not hear anything else he says, even if you are quick enough to question him or her immediately, your brain will still be focussed on what was said before and not the response to you query. That is why you need a backup brain sitting next to you. If possible have them take notes for two reasons, first it bugs the hell out of specialists when you take notes and secondly you have reference material to refer too later.

The AirX 1400 -Incentive Spirometer

Before your surgery you get a gift. It is an Incentive Spirometer. Nice Huh! Not only do you get this gift, but you get tor try it out prior to receiving it, wait there's more. After a brief test drive of your Spirometer, it gets personalized with your name on it. Sounds great doesn't it! When you do your the test drive of your shiny new Spirometer try not to show off.

This is how the Spirometer works. First you inhale as much air as possible, then you put your lips on the white plastic mouth and blow. Easy enough , yes but there is a bit of a catch, you want the little white ball to stay at the top for as long as possible. (that is within reason of course don't be too ambitious).

The nurse will congratulate you on your achievement and take your Spirometer and personilize it for you by writing down the time the ball floated at the top of the tube. She will also do something a little sly, she will reset you Spirometer from 210cc to 400cc. What does this do you may ask? It almost doubles the opening size where the air comes into the device.

Say you're a gifted individual and can suck a golf ball through a a garden hose, this effectively changes the garden hose to storm drain. You are going to pass out before you post the number nurse has written on the Incentive Spirometer. Until I noticed the changed setting I was blowing my brains out and only getting 5cc compared to the 12cc I did on my trial run. Once I found out about the little adjustment I discovered I was at 9cc. Now I have Incentive using my Spirometer, if I hadn't found that little trick they played I would have caved in my head.

Merete said that she saw the nurse change the setting. I think maybe she slid the nurse five bucks hoping that if my head caved in I would be easier to live with. She could just park me on the deck and hang flower baskets off of me.

You had Heart Surgery When.......

The Patient's View

My Top 10 things that will tell you.


1. You start talking about things in past tense. Example :"I used to love this hot weather."or"I used enjoy a cigar and a glass of port following a meal of roast lamb."

2. You have difficulty just reaching your ass, let alone wiping it.

3. When you cough, you hold a pillow and your eyes bug out.

4.You just start crying.

5. Your care giver loves you but you are a pain in the ass. You're acting at least 30 years older.

6. You blurt shit out rudely because something just stabbed you in the side.

7. You get excited about a BM.

8. Your'e happy in bed making notes on nothing.

9. You look forward to spending time with family and friends.

10. You just can't wait for tomorrow.

Tummy Face

Well say Good Bye to Tummy Face. After a sleepless night I am headed to the doctor this morning to have my stitches removed. Hopefully I'll get some sleeping pills as well, I couldn't sleep because my brain was on random play (more on that later).

8.6.kgs of water. Look out Ladies.

I always wonder why my female friends complained about retaining water. I get it now, I gained 8.6kg of fluid during the surgery. I just want to know where did it come from? The weird thing was when I woke up Tuesday morning I had lost almost all of it, I know I peed a lot but not over 16 pounds of water. Where does it go and how can you keep it away?

I'm a Drunk Painter Jim, not a Miracle Worker

Good Morning Blogite Family.

I have landed once again on my weak and wobbly feet.
It was a long ride home yesterday, giving me lots of time to ponder the past few days.
I will be doing some short entries until my strength builds, so don't expect any mystical insights or deep thoughts; as if you would anyway. The most common expression over the next few days here on the mountain will probably be "fuck that hurts" or "which pill?"

I have to rest now but in my next post I'll show you where it really hurts and tell you why!

HUGE NEWS!!

Dad was discharged today...much to my heart's delight and my anxiety's dismay!
He is home in his comfy leather chair eating ice cream as I type this (a small heart smart portion of course) He is so glad to be back on his mountain top!



A few things happened in the days leading up to his discharge.
Yesterday his hemoglobin was low and he was quite lethargic from it. To fix this he received two pints of blood which perked him right back up!

He was given new medication to get rid of the excess fluid, by yesterday evening he had only lost 2lbs....BUT overnight, he lost 10lbs! He was pretty worn out from getting up and down to go to the bathroom, but it was worth it, all that peeing was his ticket out of the hospital.

My Mom and Dad both attended a discharge orientation yesterday which detailed home care and signs to look out for in case of trouble. Today they attended an orientation on Coumadin, which is a blood thinner Dad will have to be on for the rest of his life. The orientation detailed associated risks and dietary requirements to follow while on Coumadin. My Dad was soooo happy when he learned he could never eat Kale again. I'm sure he would have jumped up and down if he was allowed :) He can't have any leafy greens which is a shame because there are actually a few that he likes!

Unfortunately, his schedule is very demanding now that he is home. He already has to go to the clinic in Sooke tomorrow to have blood work and then to the doctor the next day to have his stitches removed. He will have to go to town for blood work twice a week for the first little while. The blood work is to check his RNI levels (I think that is right) which affect how much Coumadin he needs to take. It is all very complicated! I think all the trips to town are really going to wear him out. At least he will sleep better now that he is in his own bed.

The next 4-6 weeks are going to be very tiring, and intense for both my parents, my Dad especially of course! I realize everyone will be excited to have him home and eager to get in touch, but for now it is best if we all express our excitement through emails to my Mom and blog comments.
I will be helping my Mom figure out a visiting schedule for those who are interested tentatively beginning in mid July.

That is all for now. My Mom will be doing some more blog posts from home and I will step in when she can't get to it. Sorry we left y'all hanging!

xo Janna

War Wounds - Warning, graphic pictures are included in this post!

Today's visit was definitely one of show and tell. When Travis and I arrived Dad was having his drainage bandage removed by his nurse Alma. She is the sweetest, kindest, most well humored nurse I have ever encountered, and I know my Dad feels the same.
Once the curtains were opened, we were able to come in and hang with Dad. He was lying down but wanted to get up and sit in his chair right away. He is having quite a bit of pain and inflammation which makes it hard to stay flat on his back. His ribcage and back are the most inflamed right now, and the pressure of the inflammation makes it difficult for him to breathe lying down. According to the hospital staff, this is normal, and can take a few months to go down enough that breathing is normal.

Of course as soon as he was sitting in his chair, Dad immediately unbuttoned his shirt to show us his drainage tube wound. Gross! He also undid his pants to show us some very unsightly bruising on his hip, and then displayed more bruising on his bicep. ''Someone call the vet, these pythons are sick!'' Credit to Brie for that very bad joke :)






All in all, he looked good, except for all the nasty bits he kept showing off. Travis and I also noticed how swollen his feet are, and then looked up his pant leg to find that his calves and knees were also very, very swollen. We now know where the 12lbs of fluid went! My Mom visited later and talked with my Dad and the nurses about the swelling. He is now outfitted with some compression stockings and is on more medication that will help flush out the excess fluid. He will not be discharged until the swelling goes down.



While we were sitting and chatting Dad got a new neighbor. None other than the fattest, friendliest seagull I have ever seen! He hung out by the window behind us just hoping we might open it and throw food out, or invite him in. According to Dad this isn't his first visit. He actually stops by and taps on the glass to get attention! Some hospital rooms actually have 'Do not feed the birds' signs posted.
Only on the island!



We hung out with Dad for a good hour and a half. By the end of the visit, it was obvious he was wiped out. He did get up and give us both a gentle hug, no squeezing, and walked himself to the bathroom while we were on the way out.
Today was a very difficult visit for me, and for Travis. We headed back to the mainland right from the hospital, and it was really hard to say goodbye. I know that the island is really not that far away, but it seems like across the world now that I am home. I wish I was able to be with my Dad everyday while he goes through this journey. It is probably for the best that we are back home now, I'm sure I would have driven him crazy with my neurosis and overprotective nature. What can I say, I love my Dad to pieces! In a word, he is awesome! Travis and I are hoping to make it back over this weekend. We just can't stay away!

Mom visited Dad this afternoon for a couple hours. They went to an orientation on being discharged and home care. She will update the blog with all that info soon...unless of course he comes home, which will be different news all together!

More soon...thanks for following the blog everyone, my Dad is thrilled with all the comments and support. Keep 'em coming!

xo Janna

Don't Sit Like That!!!!

Today we got in two visits to Dad. First in the afternoon, and then just after dinner.


We were all shocked to walk in at 3pm today and find him sitting up in a chair by the window. The first thing out of my mouth was, 'Did the nurse help you get into that chair?!' Of course, she did not. Oh no, my Dad doesn't need help getting in to his chair. I can't believe it! He is doing so well :) I was a nervous wreck while we sat and chatted and I watched him fidget in his chair. 'Are you sure you can reach for that?' 'Should you be leaning over?' 'How are you feeling?' 'Do you need me to get you anything?' 'Don't cross your legs!' 'Stop Travis, don't make him laugh so hard!'

I think our visits are more exhausting than his physiotherapy! Nothing like non-stop neurotic directions from your daughter! I know he really does love having us all by his side, but he certainly does let us know when he has had enough. I am grateful for his honesty though, I hate to think that we are tiring him out. He got in a good nap today and was feeling very well when we left.

We came back for our second visit at around 6pm. We arrived just after Dad had his first solid meal! It was supposed to be meatloaf, but somehow he ended up with chicken with gravy and mashed potatoes! Yum! Other big news from today, his catheter was removed, thankfully before he got a chance to show it to us! He did however try to show us some bruising on his hip, and the bandage that is absorbing the 12lbs of fluid he retained from the surgery. He did have drainage tubes which were removed, so the residual fluid is just slowly leaking into the bandage. Gross!

After some chit chat, jokes and general good times, my Dad shocked me once again when he rose from his chair and said 'Let me walk you guys out'. Seriously, what is with this guy! I couldn't stop him, he took my hand and we started walking from the room. I kept telling him to slow down, go sloooowww...keep in mind, I walk with a cane, and he was still walking faster than me! He did slow his pace, and we walked hand in hand down the hallway.
He set a goal of walking to the water station. Once he had a new cup of cold water in his hand, he kissed me goodbye and took my Mom's hand and headed back to his bed. I of course got weepy and grabbed Travis to take some pictures.


All in all, it was a wonderful couple of visits. I am so glad to be able to say that my Dad is still my Dad even after this. He is still cracking jokes, smiling and pushing to get his way :)
We all know that the surgery was just the beginning of a long road of recovery, that is still scary and full of unknown obstacles, but we also know that John Grey-Noble is a strong, determined, stubborn man, who is off to one hell of a start.

Can I show you my catheter?

With the big operation fresh in the rear view mirror John took his first step down the road to recovery today. In true John fashion he wasted no time calling Janna at 6:45 am to let her know that they were going to be moving him out of the Cardiovascular Unit and into the friendly confines of West Tower. During that conversation he also reminding his daughter that her Dad is "Superman".

We were all pleasantly surprised yet again. First his surgery takes less time then expected and now they are moving him out of CVU after only one night instead of two or three days. We are starting to get the feeling that John wants to get back to Sooke mountain as soon as possible. Molly and Brando are already beside themselves waiting for John's return and the magic pocket of dog treats.

Merete arrived at the hospital this morning at 10:45 am to find John in his new room alert and awake. She had to remind him of yesterdays visit as he had failed to remember his obsession with photos and the soon infamous Truman video. He was in good spirits except for the burlap sack filled with straw that they had placed him on. John figures he had been given Royal Jubilee's inaugural bed. Despite his bed related discomfort he did manage to stand up on his own for a brief moment.

When Janna and I arrived just after lunch we were taken aback. There sat John, glasses on indulging in some mandarin slices and steeping a cup of tea. He talked and acted like nothing was out of the ordinary. All of his tubes with the exception of one had been removed. Of course he was not shy about showing of his bandages. Not ten minutes into the visit and he was lifting his shirt up and down showing of where things had been inserted and removed. And then it came...the one thing that I never expected. Amidst his show & tell he looked up with a grin on his face and said "Can I show you my catheter?" He was joking of course but that will always remain with me. The good news is I know that I am part of the family now. Either that or one final attempt on his part to get rid of me.

We left him to sleep for a few hours during the afternoon. When we returned in the evening he had managed to get a new bed. And this one was at least from the current century. In all the commotion of moving beds and showing off his new markings he was pretty tired. We didn't stay long and we left him to get some sleep. But we will be back tomorrow bright and early to check in on him.

-Travis

Day Zero

First things first: the surgery was successful and my Dad is resting up in the Cardiac Unit of Royal Jubilee.

On Wednesday afternoon my Mom and Dad spent about five hours being oriented with the ins and outs and ups and downs of Dad's surgery the next day. Highlights included a very good breathing test by Dad (aka John) and a take-home gift of an antibacterial sponge and thorough instructions on how to properly clean out all the nooks and crannies the night and morning before surgery.

Our Mom (Merete), Dad, Janna and I went to a Greek restaurant for dinner as requested by Dad. He wanted saganaki. Really, who wouldn't want a slab of fried cheese the night before open heart surgery? Btw, it was delicious.

Dad was given a couple of pills to help him sleep on Wednesday night. He took one and it helped, but he was still up around 3:30AM. According to Janna and her husband Travis, who accompanied our Dad and Mom to the hospital at 5:30AM, his blood pressure was good and he seemed quite calm before going into to surgery at 7:30AM. I would have been there too, but I was in Sooke looking after Molly and Brando, the dogs, who were missing Dad and Mom terribly and acting like neurotic little weirdos. I gave them extra cookies.

I arrived in Victoria Thursday morning at about 11:30AM. We were expecting the surgery to last until about 3:30PM. However, after eating a delicious lunch at The Blue Fox we received a message from the doctor. The surgery was completed just before 1PM. This was good news! Everything went very well and we were told we could visit in an hour or so. There were plenty of tears of relief and much hugging on the street. We distracted ourselves by looking in an excellent stationary shop before heading to the hospital.

When we arrived at the hospital we all had to pee! We were excited! And overwhelmed! We also used hand sanitizer as we walked through the halls towards the Cardiac Unit - possibly more of a nervous reaction than for health reasons. The nurse buzzed us into the Unit and we were shown to Dad's bed. The nurse on duty assured us that everything went well. He was awake and mostly lucid when we arrived, quietly calling out "Merete" when he saw us walking towards his bed (pretty good for a guy who needs glasses). He was mostly comfortable, but there was some pain around the area where the draining tubes were coming out of the wound (which was bandaged up). One thing we had been warned about was that heart patients have a tendency to gain between 2-15 pounds of water weight following surgery. Fortunately, Dad didn't seem too puffy except for a little swelling around his mouth.

Janna and Travis also came to say "hello" and check in. We spent about ten minutes or so standing around in awe, shock, joy and various other extreme emotions, but mostly relief. We knew he was doing well when he started doing his Truman Capote impression. The previous night he had requested that I take some photos for the blog knowing that I am cut of the same cloth and would gladly oblige the request (I have a tendency to document everything with my digital camera like a huge nerd). In fact, his nurse told us that after the respirator was removed it was one of the first things he asked for. While taking photos I joked that I could shoot a video. He beckoned me closer and said "Yes, a video." Here it is - followed by photos (there are tubes and a little blood---you have been warned). The next update will probably be by Mom/Merete and up in the next couple of days. ~ Brie

Almost the Big Day

Well tomorrow is the big day.

On Monday we were up at 6:00am after little sleep and managed to get the blood work done and an ECG.

Tuesday after a better nights sleep we made it to the dentist and I had two fillings replaced .




I managed to organize our Strata banking, wrote a couple of cheques , one to a Water Service Company and a second, the most important one to the Sooke Fine Arts Show. While my darling went to town and did the banking and mailing, I managed to frame my two pieces for the show.
I also wired a small print by Larry Tillyer that Merete wants me to hang. All in all a productive two days. The other thing we did was buy a half a dozen gold fish for our ponds and introduced the fish into their new home. They could grow up 12" in length.

Today is almost the big day, we will be headed back to the Royal Jubilee Hospital for pre-surgery orientation. This should be 4 to 5 hours of fun. I won't be posting anything for at least a week but Merete will be once she gets home. We will be staying at Motel close to the hospital tonight because I have to be there at 5:30 am. Brie and Janna will be over today. Brie is going to stay with the dogs in Sooke and Janna will be downtown with us awaiting the arrival of her husband Travis. Travis, Janna and Brie will be with their Mom while I'm in surgery. After my surgery Brie will be headed off to her new job in Geneva, very exciting!

I thank you all for you support and kind words. I look forward to seeing you all soon.

John

The Dance that almost killed me.

You know if there was a way to go this would have been it. Ain't dead yet....... dancing at one of your two beloved daughters weddings would have been the way, oh man yessss! This is the first version of my little dance movie. Once I can sit at my computer for a few more hours I will edit this and add pictures of all my beautiful nieces and nephews, friends and loved ones cutting a rug.

Man what a party Travis & Janna put on! Good on you, you can plan my next party!

This is what life is about loving your family and friends.

Cheers til sometime in the next few weeks. John

Did I mention it was sooo worth it!

Schedule

As you can see I look enthusiastic.

Just kidding, this is an old picture and I like to post pictures when I write this stuff. I'll show Merete how to post pictures while I am indisposed.







Monday, May 25 Time: 8:45 am Royal Jubilee Hospital - Clinic Pre-Operation.

Tuesday, May 26 Time: 8:30 am Dr. Walker -Dentist- 2 fillings.

Wednesday, May 27 Time: 11:30 am Royal Jubilee - Pre-Surgery Meeting 4 to 5 hours.

Thursday, May 28 Time: 5:30 am -Royal Jubilee Surgery 4-6 hours.

Merete will be setting up a phone tree for directly after the surgery. I should be home from surgery with 5 to 10 days. After settling in at home I should be able to post little notes between resting and recovering. In the meantime Merete will be posting updates and comments on what a crappy patient I am. As Merete has stated on numerous ocaisions she will be cooking so this should speed my recovery. Even though I am a proud Canadian, man cannot live on Mac & Cheese alone or Svins Pul sur Ry (Swedish Weiner Dish- I know I spelled it wrong).

Background on Surgery

This diagram shows the inner workings of my heart. As you can see on the right of the illustration, the surgeon has drawn a dotted line. This indicates where my heart has started to enlarge again. Why is it getting enlarged, you ask? The aortic valve has started to fail. I have a bi-cuspid instead of a tri-cuspid valve. This is a birth defect, that can go unnoticed for years.

Fortunately for me, the valve can be fixed. What has happened over the past six months is that the valve is not closing fully and the blood that it is pumping is flowing back into the chamber. My heart has started to work harder to compensate for this leakage. This has caused it to enlarge.

In the upper right corner of the illustration is a rendering of the artificial valve the doctors will be replacing my damaged valve and a portion of my aortic root and possibly the aortic arch with a Dacron Tube. My aortic root is enlarged and a rupture could occur. Believe me this would not be good.